So much of what we do as moms begins early in pregnancy or even before. There is very little understanding in American culture that any young woman who is of childbearing age should really be aware of their own nutrition. Since the Standard American Diet (SAD) tends to be… well… sad and completely devoid of most necessary nutrients, we have a long way to go in helping future generations do better. Not just when their pregnant, but better at understanding the true lifelong need for understanding how to best nourish ourselves for our own sake.
What is true self-care?
There’s a million voices out there these days telling us how necessary self-care is. Often though, it seems like those ideas lean toward going out and shopping or getting a manicure or getting our hair done. While none of those ideas are inherently bad, and they may even boost our mood temporarily, there’s no true long-term care happening with it.
True self care is when we choose to change or do something in our everyday life to reflect a long-term system of nourishing ourselves – body, mind, and soul. In that vein, I suggest to moms and moms-to-be everywhere that the mindset become more of “what have I done to nourish myself today?” rather than this vague notion of self-care.
Nourishment suggests doing something truly vital to support myself, not just now, but in the future.
Thankfully, I’m not the only one who has really been questioning the status quo. There is so much more information out there now about how to nourish yourself now and for the future in so many different ways. Ways that tend to be more meaningful in the long run.
I’m definitely not suggesting that you don’t ever get that manicure or cancel your hair appointment. But I am suggesting we look at those things as what they are, fun additions to our lives (if they are that for you) – and recognize that they aren’t really going to enhance our lives long-term.
Nourishing the Mother – An Entirely New Thought Process
Ideally, postpartum nourishment and recovery would be something a woman would contemplate even before she finds herself pregnant. That question I mentioned earlier in a little different form, “what can I do today to start my journey toward truly nourishing myself?” It’s not a question any of us are likely to hear. But it is deeply satisfying to truly consider the answers.
Can I change my personal care products to be safer for my body? Can I change one part of how I choose to feed my body to reflect a new direction? Can I use safer products in my household?
What matters to you? What do you feel drawn to that gives your soul peace to consider? Think about it for a bit. Consider a variety of options.
Mothering the Mother – A Community Affair
There are traditions throughout the world that emphasize a community effort to nourish expecting and new moms. Some of the traditions are simple, some are profoundly complex, but all of them have one thing in common – a community of women who support (or mother) the mother.
You may not have a great relationship with your own mom, so the concept of being mothered may not sound great to you – I get it! But the concept of true motherhood, where you are loved, supported and surrounded by care and peace is what we have to wrap our minds around. This is where healthy family units begin.
How to Begin
I’m not looking to get into all the nuances and details about this process. I’m simply looking to encourage you to think about the concept. Take a deep dive and consider how this might change your life, or even just your day to start. How would it look or feel to add that one food that you know would truly nourish you and your baby? How about changing your skin care?
The point is, start with one thing – just one!
Looking for resources?
I have some truly fantastic resources, especially for pregnancy to get started on your journey. Primarily as it pertains to food – which is one of the best places to start.
- The Food Doula Cookbook: by Lindsay Taylor. This book is hands down the go-to book I recommend for expecting moms and their family/friends. If you’re looking for an incredible, beautiful and helpful tool for nourishment from pre-pregnancy through postpartum, this is my first pick!
- The First Forty Days: by Heng Ou. This is one of my biggest recommendations primarily for those supporting an expecting/new mom. If you’re interested in the time-honored tradition of supporting a more caring, supported, nourished recovery for new mom, this is the book for you.